As of midnight tonight, a shelter in place order will be in effect for the San Francisco Bay Area. What does this mean?

It means that there’s no toilet paper or rice to be had across four counties.

Our grandparents fought in a world war; I guess I can use less toilet paper.

Where I live in Sonoma County is technically exempt - or at least hasn’t made the order official yet - but never leaving the house is how I live my life, so I might as well keep doing that. Only now I get to call it “helping humanity.”

You’re welcome, humans.

In my adult life, I’ve lived through 9/11, the stock crash of ‘08, Hurricane Sandy on Staten Island, the election of Trump, and multiple Sonoma wildfires. Add that to so many personal life upheavals (breakups, miscarriage, death, severely uncertain finances) that I have a very “wait and see” attitude toward looming disaster. I’ve also learned recently that one of the signs of trauma is to become eerily calm when everyone around you is panicking. I do this. It’s a safe bet that the only time I’ll be able to successfully meditate is when the zombie apocalypse is upon us.

So from my state of eerie calm and “we’ll see”, the question on my mind is: at what point during the lockdown will it become socially acceptable to ask Twitter to moderate arguments?

(Can he get mad at me because there isn’t enough butter in the cookies when he made the cookies but I wasn't in the kitchen to stop him from doing it wrong, Y/N.)

The other question is, how many pictures can I share of the cat before it gets obnoxious?

Social distancing means helping the kitties with their Tinder profiles.